My Untitled Story, Who wants to help me! Options

[Charmy]

Well, who wants to help me make my story better or help me edit it. I know that sounds boring but it'll be funner than you think. Anyone can add in ideas but warning, I may not use 'em. So BEWARE!
Well, the story is like a show, it doesn't just doesn't focus on one person it focus on a couple, so don't get confused. I got my idea from Twilight's RPG (Thankyou!).
Now, it does get a bit creepy, before I add a creepy part to the story, like blood or dead bodies, try not to read if you don't wanna.
Now, this is also a place where you can just read my story and not help me (Dam you!) Anyway, here is the beginning part:



'Isn't it so beautiful...'
'Yeah.' Erin turns his head to his love. Capri is staring at the sky
clueless of it all. 'Capri...' Capri turns her head to Erin 'D-do you think...'
'Do I think what?'
'Do you think that... Anything co-could happen with...'
'With who?' Erin was slightly frustrated, and was finding it hard to speak. Capri was looking at him, wondering what he was going to say. Capri was halve-knee deep in the water while Erin was on the grass. He came forward to Capri. He looked at the sky when Capri was staring at him. 'Yes?'
Erin thinks about all the times when thet were little. They had been best friends from when they first met. He was hoping that he wouldn't destroy any of that.
'Do you think you could love me?' Capri looked out to the moon. Capri was silent, and Erin looked down into the water and watched her reflection. He had saw her walk over to him, he turned around to her. 'Do you?' Capri smiles and puts her hand on his cheek. She kissed him in the moonlight. They wrapped their arms around eachover and kissed. When their lips left eachover Capri said I do. Erin smiles, Capri smiles, they then walk off deeper in Kischt forest.



So, what do you think so far?

[Charmy]

Yes, re-pasting and I changed it a slight bit.



As Ko and Daze were in the forest Daze showed Ko her newest discovery of herself. Ko sometimes whined. He was slightly scared of her new discovery.
'Oh, sorry doggie. I didn't mean to scare you.' Daze pats him and Ko feels better.
Daze looks up in the sky and stared at the moon. Thunder then strikes. 'Oh, I better get home before it rains.' As thunder strikes harder and clouds slowly appear so do two people. A shining green light comes and two poeple walk through, it then closes with a shake. 'This is right.' Said a man, there was woman standing beside him.
Ko bites on Daze's leg but she doesn't move, he runs behind a tree. Daze stares at them. She see's him raise his arm in the sky, in front of the moon, he then whispered words and soon the ground rumbles. Daze tries to keep balance while Ko whimpers behind the tree. Rain starts to fall as disfigured hands dig to the surface from underneath the ground. Two disfigured body's grabbed onto Daze, she screamed as they held her, the man who awakened the demons had placed his arm down and come to Daze with a grin.
'Remember me?'
Daze gulps, she shakes her head. 'Follow.' The two demons followed the man carrying Daze, the woman came along without a word.
'Help!' Daze yells hopelessly. Her feet start to drag on the ground as the monsters continue to grab onto her. Daze decides to give up.
Ko follows cleverly behind trees watching carefully...



I have more to write, about something else, but I won't to leave you questioned.
No more artist's block! I didn't like this other part of my story then I couldn't write any more, so I wrote this and now I am flooding with idea's.
Main request help with my story: I forgot about a title. Who wants to suggest one?

Comments?