Jack. The Sequel. Ok Not Sequel But Fanfic :], Not for bubelehs Options

[Hasfusel]

Jack: HEY FATTY, SAY NO TO BURGERS!
Van: HEY JACK, SAY NO TO A NICE CUP OF STFU, OH WAIT DON'T BECAUSE YOU COULD DO WITH ONE.
Jack: Go drown in some chocolate milk, EXCEPT IT WOULD MAKE YOU FATTER SO YEAAAAHHH!
Van: WHERE DID MY LIFE GO WRONG? D; *cries*
Jack. The Sequel, Ok Not ?Sequel? But fanfic :]

(Setting: Romana's Mansion, 4:44 PM)
Sebastian: So Romana how bout we get married and Enjoy some Quality time now that Luminas shacking up with Murrey?!
Romana: Get your Filthy hands away from me you Monster, you just want my money, I can't stand your Ugly nose, OH WHO AM I KIDDING c'mere you
Sebastian: ROMANA NO I WAS JOKING
Romana: GIVE IT TO ME BIG BOY, UH UHH UHH
Sebastian: HELP MEEEEEEEEEEE
*mayor thomas walks in*
Mayor Thomas: Heard someone Cry for Help, does Somebody Need my assistan- OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS
Gustafa: OMG ITS SO HUGE UH UH UH UHHHHHHHH!
Romana: who let YOU In here? A CHALLENGER APPEARS!!
Mayor Thomas: OH MY GOD WHAT IS THIS
Gustafa: FEELS GOOD MAN

(Setting: Next Day, Jack?s Father is at the Inner Inn)

Jack?s Father: So I Hear you have aids now Gustafa.
Gustafa: (IMG:style_emoticons/default/lalasad.gif) Its true
Mayor Thomas: OH GOD NO THAT MEANS-
Sebastian: OH GOD NO THAT MEANS-
Ruby: OH GOD NO THAT MEANS-
Tim: HEY RUBY WTF
Jack?s Father: hold on Everyone now SHUT THE FLUFFY CHEESECAKE UP
*silence*
Jack?s Father: So how long?ve you got left Gustafa old Pal?
Gustafa: eight Minutes.
Jack?s Father: Have ye any last Regrets Before we Lay you to Rest?
Gustafa: yeah, My only regret is, I never went to Funland!
Jack?s Father: THATS MY LINE GIVE IT BACK YOU THEIF YOU HIPPIE THIEF
Gustafa: TOO LATE, SEEMS MY WATCH WAS SEVEN MINUTES SLOW *waits for few seconds and dies*
Jack?s Father: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

To. Be. CONTINUED.

Nobody except Chrisgopher can add to this.

Reference

[Christopher]

Hasslehoff.

I could never live up to Pickle's work, but I will admit, you did a pretty fine darn job at replicating exactly what he would say.
Kudos.

You should also try doing a threequel. Ok, not threequel but fanfic.

[Hasfusel]

CONTINUED

Jack: trollolololol, I put a Poison Mushroom at the harvest Festival

(Setting: the harvest Festival)
Mayor thomas: Hey Vesta you just got served
*serve's Vesta who drinks the soup*
Vesta: THIS SOUP IS DISGUESTING, IT TASTES LIKE FRANCE
French person: Well I think it Tastes like Your Momma! (who I slept with last night, oohhh ohhh ahhh hubba hubba)
Vesta: hey go CRUMPETS yourself
Murrey: Everyone calm the CRUMPETS down, I know it tastes like CRUMPETS but we all tried our best and thats what counts, now drink up
Everyone: Hey Murrey, how come you didnt say Moi
Murrey: what
Everyone: Murrey you always say Moi at the end of everything
Murrey: oh yeah, uh I need to go take a CRUMPETS or something, see you guys, uh I mean MOI
Everyone: oh CRUMPETS, its an impostor, after him
Murrey: CRUMPETS, foiled again *is Jack*
Everyone: WHAT A TWIST
Jack (oh whatatwist): yeah but you all drank the Stew which I Poisoned so now you'll all die in like a second
Everyone: OUR COLLECTIVE LAST REGRET IS tHAT WE NEVER W *everyone die's Except for jack*
Stan & Kyle: OH MY GOD HE KILLED KENNY, YOU BASTARD
Jack: YESSSS now I get to Marry the Witch Priness
Witch Princess: Nope cause now you gotta do it again for the next four years
Jack: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

TO BE CONTINUED (maybe)

[Hasfusel]

Jack: And now, let me show in a figure how far our nature is enlightened or unenlightened: --Behold! human beings living in a underground den, which has a mouth open towards the light and reaching all along the den; here they have been from their childhood, and have their legs and necks chained so that they cannot move, and can only see before them, being prevented by the chains from turning round their heads. Above and behind them a fire is blazing at a distance, and between the fire and the prisoners there is a raised way; and you will see, if you look, a low wall built along the way, like the screen which marionette players have in front of them, over which they show the puppets.

Mayor Thomas: I see.

Jack: And do you see men passing along the wall carrying all sorts of vessels, and statues and figures of animals made of wood and stone and various materials, which appear over the wall? Some of them are talking, others silent.

Mayor Thomas: You have shown me a strange image, and they are strange prisoners.

Jack: Like ourselves, and they see only their own shadows, or the shadows of one another, which the fire throws on the opposite wall of the cave?

Mayor Thomas: True; how could they see anything but the shadows if they were never allowed to move their heads?

Jack: And of the objects which are being carried in like manner they would only see the shadows?

Mayor Thomas: Yes.

Jack: And if they were able to converse with one another, would they not suppose that they were naming what was actually before them?

Mayor Thomas: Very true.

Jack: And suppose further that the prison had an echo which came from the other side, would they not be sure to fancy when one of the passers-by spoke that the voice which they heard came from the passing shadow?

Mayor Thomas: No question.

Jack: To them, the truth would be literally nothing but the shadows of the images.

Mayor Thomas: That is certain.

Gustafa: The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for