My Writings Options

[Aki-Chan]

I'm just going to put some short stories, songs, and poems I've written in here. I would really like opinions, and don't worry I don't mind constructive criticism.

I'll start off with a short(really short) story that I wrote last year, it is a pure comedy that was written out of boredom, and it's called-

The Sleep & Brained Deprived

In a normal park on a normal day two friends sat on a normal bench.
"I'm bored!" whined a boy with brown short hair, Brown eyes, Wearing a black baggy T-shirt and a pair of dark blue jeans.
"You’re always bored Jake." Said another boy uninterested, this boy had black hair, Brown eyes and was wearing a white shirt with a green clover on it, A ring with the letter R in graven on it, and tan pants.
"But Ryan today I'm even boreder the normal!" The boy called Jake shouted.
"Yeah that's nice. Oh and it's more bored not boreder." Said the other boy Ryan who seemed like he would rather be sleeping then talking.
"You’re so heartless! I'm going to stop being your friend if you don't do something to entertain me." Warned Jake wagging his finger in Ryan's face.
"Alright I'll do something."
"Really what?!"
"Come closer." Ryan said a smirk growing on his face as Jake did exactly as he told him.
"Okay do it." Jake said eagerly.
"I did."
"What? What do you mean you did?"
Leaning back against the bench Ryan explained "Well for that short while you were entertained."
"...Sometimes I really...Don't like you that much." Said Jake pouting.
"Yeah... Can I go home now?"
"No! As my friend you must suffer with me!"
"Your sooo caring" Ryan said sarcastically.
"Yes I am." Jake agreed smiling, completely missing the sarcasm.
"So what do we do now." Ryan asked after rolling his eyes at his friend’s stupidity.
"...I don't know. What do you want to do?"
"Sleep."
"Why are you so tired anyway?"
"Because it's 4:00 in the morning!"
Jake made no reply to this.
"Well don't you have anything to say?" Ryan asked.
After a moment of deep thought Jake replied "So that's why no one's here!"
"You sugar high moron!" Ryan yelled upset by his friend’s lack of common sense.

End

I'll probably post more tomorrow. "Probably" being the key word.

[Aki-Chan]

No comments? Oh well... Maybe this will go over better.
It's the first part(I don't feel like putting the whole thing) of a song I wrote a few weeks before Christmas.

It's Gonna be Alright

All these burdens we have to bear,
and the tears of sorrow we cry.
All help to make ourselves better,
Though we may not know how or why.

Hoping for help but not asking
No one can hear the silent plea.
People seem to run right on by.
Passing those in need, why can't they see?

Those who think they are falling,
cause they've got nothing left.
The weary soul that struggles,
With troubles they have to heft.
Fearing losing everything,
and that's not very much.
Why can't we give them something,
Some kind acts, a gentle touch?
We can give them loving words,
Tell them, It's gonna be alright.
It's gonna be alright...

Any thoughts about it?

[Charmy]

Cool story, made me chuckle.
You have very nice writing skills, and nice rhyming too. Keep using them well.

[Aki-Chan]

That's good, since the whole purpose of that story is to make people laugh.
Thank you very much! I have to admit that I haven't really written all that much though... Hence another reason why I made this topic. So that I would be more motivated.
Once again, thank you for taking the time to post.

[Charmy]

That's alright. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/lalasmile.gif)
Wh ydon't you challenge yourself on making a long story?

[Aki-Chan]

Well, there are a few long stories I'm writing currently, the thing is I've never finished any long ones... I'm going try harder at that though.

[Aki-Chan]

Here are two poems I randomly wrote today.

Gone

When I came home they were yelling,
once I saw I couldn't stop staring.

They didn't seem to be in love,
not when they pushed, not when they shoved.

Now Dad's real mad, he grabbed his keys,
then out the door he made his leave.

Why is Mommy crying so much?
Don't worry he'll be back for lunch!

But Daddy still has not come back,
I wonder where he could be at...

Hey Daddy am I really that bad?
Is that why you are still so mad?

One month, two months, soon many years.
Still they haven't dried, our many tears.

End

I just felt like writing something about a little boy going through a tragedy, and poof! This was born.

Change

I have never been that good a man,
there are many things that I regret.
But I can change myself, I know I can.
I'll become the man I need to be.

This is the promise I made that day,
as I looked down at my baby girl.
But I need help, so I'll kneel and pray,
begging you for the courage I lack.

To protect her heart, to make her smile,
I'll do whatever you want me to.
Help me change my current life style!
Only you can hear my silent plea...

End

I don't really know where this came from, but it makes me want to listen to "The Reason" - By Hoobastank.

Anyways, I hope you guys like them.

[Aki-Chan]

Okay, here's what will hopefully be a longer story.

The Help Club

Ryan was doing one of the things he did best- Walking. To his school to be more specific. He had a slight hop in his step, due to his excitement. Today was the day he and his two best friends established their club. It wasn't a normal club though, it was going to be a club designed to help others with any problems they might have, mostly emotional problems, since Ryan and his friends had overcome most common emotional problems themselves, they all wished to help others who might be going through what they had gone through.

Ryan quickened his pace when he noticed his friends waving at him.
Jake, one of his two friends, was waving absurdly fast, it looked like his arm was going to fly off any moment, so of course Ryan had to reach them before that happened.
"Hey Jake, Katie." Ryan greeted as he approached them. Katie nodded in reply.
"Hey man!" Was Jake's more eager reply. "Oh my gosh you won't believe it!" Oh no, Ryan knew that whenever Jake said that line it meant either something wonderful had happened, or he had done something stupid again. Usually it was the latter.
"I got our club all set up!" Say what now? No, please no, Ryan did not want to see what kind of stupid thing he had named it! Ryan looked to Katie with horror, and she nodded glumly. He had named it something stupid.
Ryan turned slowly to the very excited Jake.
"What did you call it?" He asked monotonously.
"Wha"
"What. Did. You. Call. It." He repeated through gritted teeth.
Jake looked nervous now,
"Oh well you see about that..." He giggled nervously, honestly, Jake was the only guy Ryan had ever met who giggled.
Katie sighed, then pointed to her right.
"That." she said simply. Ryan looked in the direction she was pointing, and saw a poster. On the poster, in big, bold, red letters it said-

'Do you need help? Well look no further! Come on down and join the Help Club. And we'll fix you up!'

Ryan stared in stunned silence at the poster, his mouth agape.
"Hehe, what do ya think of it?" Jake asked, still obviously nervous. Ryan took a deep breath.
"What do I think!? I think that it's absolutely stupid! What were you thinking? The help club?! That's so lame! And we'll fix you up? That makes it sound like they're broken"
"Well technically-" Katie began.
"Shush! The point is not many, if any, people will join now! I wouldn't even want to join." Ryan huffed and nodded his head, signaling that he was now done talking.
Jake started to whimper, all he wanted to do was help, to do make it so that Ryan and Katie could relax while he did it. Jake's eyes started to water, as his whimpering grew louder, causing all who walked by to stare and whisper amongst themselves.
Katie sighed, and Ryan almost slapped his forehead in frustration.

Why had he became friends with this guy? Seriously, he couldn't remember.
"Okay! It's not that bad." Oh, yes it is. His mind argued. "Besides it's the thought that counts. So thanks." Ryan mumbled the last few words.
"R-Really?" Jake asked his eyes wide with hope.
"Yeah"
"Then you're not mad at me?" Ryan straggled with himself for a few moments.
"... No. I'm not mad." He finally replied.
"What about you Katie, are you mad at me?" Jake asked turning to Katie. She shrugged her shoulders,
"Not really." To be honest she wasn't mad in the first place, she was amused if anything.
"Yay!" Jake cried happily, forcing both Ryan and Katie into a hug.
"Jake's mood swings are tiring." Katie whispered to Ryan, who nodded in reply.

To be continued...

Any thoughts on it? If you read the first story I posted you might discover something interesting, if you haven't already.

[Charmy]

Is it the Jakes?

I like it, nice. Keep it up! (IMG:style_emoticons/default/lalasmile.gif)

[Aki-Chan]

Yeah kinda. The two boys in "The Sleep & Brained Deprived" are the same Ryan and Jake from this story.

I'm really glad, thanks!